My Adventurous Journey

Berea, KY

I'm breathless, I'm sweating very, very large bullets, I'm this close to exhausting my water ration, and I'm not really sure where I'm going to find the strength to lift myself on top of one more rock. Yet, I'm doing it and am determined not to complain.

"I think the trail is pretty flat from here on out."
"Don't challenge nature, Val! Nature will laugh in your face." 

My best friend, Val, is the bubbly, blonde yogi pushing past branches and creating a path for me. She does this "hiking thing" often...and I'm thankful true friends don't judge each other by how long they would survive alone in the wilderness. Let's just say...in matters of the wild, you want Val on your team.

In December of 2013, Miss Kentucky, Jenna Day (read about her Adventurous Journey here), and the Boy Scouts of Kentucky brought the Duke of Edinburgh Award to the Bluegrass. The free and optional DofE Award promotes self-discipline, growth, and aims to push you outside your boundaries. Aside from performing one hour of a special skill (I chose tap-dancing), physical recreation (I chose weight lifting), and community service every week for three months, I was required to embark on an "Adventurous Journey." 

I just love the sound of that. 

The point of the Adventurous Journey is to explore the expanse outside of your comfort zone. Now, I love being outside as much as the next girl, but my comfort zone is about as far as I can drag a beach chair away from the ocean while still getting a gentle salty mist on my face. Hiking isn't my preferred choice of weekend activity, what with all the sweating, and the bugs, and the BEARS...thus, it is quite adventurous a journey for me.

So, I left the planning up to Valerie. I wouldn't trust anyone else to put up with me when I'm tired and dehydrated in the outdoors. When she wasn't helping me climb or stopping and smiling for yet another selfie, we talked about life, her plans to start a women's retreat and spa, and laughed at everything; mostly ourselves. 

We hiked Red River Gorge, Natural Bridge State Park, and The Pinnacles in Berea. If I needed any further proof that Kentucky is one of the most diverse and breathtaking places in the U.S.--if not the world--I need no more. I was easily distracted from my own lack of endurance by the sheer beauty of the scenery. So, of course, I took a million pictures.

Val brought her other best friend along. Gilbert was such a good hiking buddy!

My Adventurous Journey definitely served its purpose in opening the door to meaningful activity outside of my norm and provided time for much needed self-reflection. My breath was taken away by numerous mountain-top views (and one really dark tunnel), I laughed myself a little closer to a six-pack, and got to practice keeping my "big picture perspective" in mind. It wasn't until I arrived back in Greensburg late Monday night that I realized just how adventurous my journey truly was. I came away with four spider bites, a really painful, full-body sunburn, and a touch of poison ivy (turns out I'm not immune, Val!), but...

Thanks to you, Duke of Edinburgh, I am recharged! And, once the sunburn heals, really tan.

Just kidding. 

Happy Friday, folks :)

P.S. I'm sure I wasn't nearly as big a drama queen as I made myself sound, but Val deserves a shout-out for not only picking the most scenic, challenging (while doable), and least crowded trails, but for being the most wonderful host, best friend, and life coach I could ever have. 

The Art of Self-Sabotage

If you could learn something about me based on the content of my Pinterest account, it's that I really, really love nail art, coffee, and inspirational quotes.

Most mornings, if I'm not running late (so, some mornings) I take half an hour or so to sit on the couch with my cat and a cup of coffee and scroll through the "quotes" category on Pinterest--my version of a mini motivational speech every morning. I may find a lot or a little content that I really connect with, but I absorb a lot of what I see; sometimes a blessing and sometimes a curse.

This week it was a blessing. At the time, I didn't realize something was bugging me...but as I was getting in bed one night, my brain was searching for the specific and very accurate wording of a quote I had apparently glazed right over. I lay in bed, phone above my face, scrolling and searching and scrolling and searching...

Until ALAS. It appeared: 

In competition, and specifically in pageants, you hear a lot about sabotage. I, for one, have maybe only witnessed this once. But let's be real. As much time as I spend in preparation for Miss Kentucky, my life is not a pageant. In my real life, I am sabotaged on the regular. What's most interesting is that it's not others I have to watch out for. It's me.

Since graduating from college, I've said "I'm so stressed out, I'll never get it done, there isn't enough time, I have too much to do" more times than I can count. Let's be real again. I need to stop the whining.

The truth is, I'll never get it all done if I'm putting too much on my plate. So, I simply started paying attention to the source and timing of my stress—whether from work, relationships, or Miss KY prep—and I found that my self-sabotage lies in my method of measuring hard work.

My personal brand of self-sabotage. Basically, when I'm at my most productive, I feel completely out of control. On the rare days that I get everything on my list done before dark, I’m frantically trying to remember what I’ve forgotten. I can’t relax if I "haven't worked hard enough"...because isn't the measure of success slaving away from dawn to dusk? (Kiley’s brain says YEP) Is this helpful? Do I get more accomplished? Negative. Most of the time, I feel so overwhelmed I end up taking a two-hour nap. And this does nothing for me except take me from 0 to 60 on the grouch scale.

The self-sabotage cocktail of doom.
Add my impossible standard of success to another common theme of a past Kiley: playing the comparison game. The comparison game is when play your behind-the-scenes against someone else’s highlight reel. Aka: The worst thing you can do. 

I do this and my inner dialogue starts a-rollin'...

“My card designs are boring, I don’t run fast enough, I would never survive the Hunger Games, my calves aren’t proportionate with the rest of my leg (YES, that is a ‘thing’), my writing style is too simple, I'm not good at sudoku puzzles so I'm a failure, I don’t know enough about [insert random topic]…” It just goes on. 

And on.

And on. 

As I'm climbing the ladder toward my goals--that seems more like climbing Mt. Everest--my logical, sensible self recognizes that no two people reach the same end point in the same way. Yet, that little voice keeps telling me that my way is wrong and everyone else’s must be right.

Doctor, IS THERE A CURE? 

Yeah! I'll be blunt. I just told myself to SHUT UP. Eventually, you realize you've got POWER over that little voice in your head. You realize it isn't pre-programmed....instead, it is a customizable, adjustable little setting you can even switch completely off if you so choose. I found it easiest to redesign the structure of dialogue in my brain when I pretended it sounded like me if I were a really energetic, inspirational aerobics instructor who talks in all caps.

“YOU GOT THIS!”

“GO AT YOUR OWN PACE!”

“YOU’RE *KILLING IT*”

“TAKE A WATER BREAK IF YOU NEED IT!”

“LOOK AT YOU, GURL!”

“YEAH! HIGH KICK!”

“MODIFY THIS MOVE IF YOU’RE A BEGINNER!”

Sometimes "Aerobics Instructor Kiley" gets a little annoying. And that's when I shut her off. But she sure is nice to have around for all those times I let my inner voice bully me into thinking I'm not totally awesome....because, let's be real. I am awesome.

AND SO ARE YOU.

I don't know if you all needed to read this as much as I needed to write it... but either way, each day we're granted the chance to get out of bed and make something of ourselves. We must remember that no one can hurt our chances at success quite like we can! And if you EVER let anyone tell you Pinterest is a waste of time...find your inner aerobics instructor and high kick some sense into them.

With that in mind, I'm feelin' pretty darn fabulous and I hope you are too. See y'all next week! 

Random Five Friday

Hello and happy June! I had a really busy and exciting weekend at Miss Kentucky 2014 Orientation. Then, I had a really busy and exciting week at work! I feel like I never stop going--especially now. Miss Kentucky is a short, SHORT 5 weeks away. Leading up to the competition, I'll be talking a lot about my preparation and giving thanks to my incredible sponsors. Today, I'm takin' it easy with a Random 5 Friday.

1. Come out and support our Greensburg Kids in their production of Disney's Aristocats KIDS! It will undoubtedly be the most adorable thing you've seen all week. 

 2. Hannah and I celebrated the completion of her medical school boards with shopping, dining, and The Book of Mormon on Broadway! We shopped at Why Louisville in NuLu (and...definitely spotted Jim James of My Morning Jacket Fame) where I picked up a shirt for myself (L) and one for my male counterpart (R) who is currently residing in New Mexico!

We selfie'd in front of the Kentucky Center for the Performing Arts

3.  As Miss Monticello, I want to say a big South Eastern KY thank you to one of my sponsors for Miss Kentucky 2014, the City of Monticello!

4. Kentucky turned 222 this month and sweet little Greensburg turns 222 on August 30th. The City of Greensburg has some REALLY exciting things in the works for a birthday bash. Mark your calendars NOW! 

5. Today, I'm wearing a brand new dress from Awaken Boutique in Campbellsville. Brianna is one of the sweetest (and most stylish) women I've ever met! If you haven't stopped by her store lately, please do! Her summer selection is out of this world. And she's (always) got great deals!

See y'all next Friday the 13th!